A Little Bit Longer but I Still Would't be fine

I'm depressed, I'm upset and I have the 'Goth' scribbled on my arm. There is clearly something wrong with me.

Tmr is the last event I can gate crash, seeing that I am 'invited' for every subsequent event. Almost every event. It's the Sec 4 Graduation. And I'm confused at some point. It's good riddance to some Sec 4 who are dirt (which is er... 1 or 2) but a final farewell to at least a hundred of awesome Sec 4 who knows me. Personally, I feel that many just started to see the real me.

Quoting from Demi Lovato's "This is me" from Camp Rock (which was a utter disappointment): "This is real. This is me. I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be." ... "No more hiding who I want to be. This is me."

I think I have given some the wrong impression sometimes. I am really sorry and I think I really learned that I don't know what I have until it's gone... But my sincerest apologises cannot erase the effects of my actions and words.

To all Sec 4s, this is it. Your life will move onto JC or Poly. Your choices are up to you now and I hope you remember the four years in SJI. Come back and visit. To the prefects, I am trying to make the funfair possible. If it is, come and join in.

Then there is exam. Gosh. I think I'm just going to die soon. I think everyone is experiencing the same but I feel like there is more pressure to stay alive than to do well.

If I have one cent for every time I feel like dying, I will be own all the money in the world.

The worse thing to give a hopeless person is hope. I really felt like dying and when my illness was not life-threatening, I kinda sunk. I also don't know why I'm still living.

The best thing: Surgery

The worse thing: Hell


OH, I'm putting up my favourite songs on the imeem. I think my songs are going to be depression songs.

PS. IF YOU KNOW A GOOD THERAPIST, RECOMMEND 'EM TO ME. THANKS.